Tuesday, December 19, 2006
there is this emptiness in my heart
it has been there for a long time
just that it wasnt significant
now that it is raining
it feels like the hole has expanded
and i feel terrible wif it
is it because i didnt finish my hols hw
cant be
is it because i haven gotten my new stick yet
nah
is it because sch is reopening
who cares
is it because i am going on another trip again
maybe
is it because i lost sumthing
maybe
is it because i nvr say hi
dunno
is it because i miss sumbody
dunno
or is it because i noe the answer yet i do not wan to admit it
i feel very empty
like as if i am living a unfufilling life
a world without dreams
a game without passion
a task wif no objectives or motivations
i went to penang wif a heavy heart
instead i enjoyed the whole trip
felt like i had almost everything
from teammates to honour
yet once i stepped back home
that feeling sank back
i am confused and unfocused
i feel like i just wasted 1 yr in JC (except for the hockey part)
i feel like i just lost a very good fren (which i am gonna be in 4 months time)
i wanna noe wats wrong wif me
i wanna noe wat is that missing part
wat i lost
and where can i find it
or izzit just that i noe the answer yet i do not wan to admit it
i am such a coward...
surprisingly the rain reflects how i feel...
picard was here @ 11:23 PM
